Guest Post - Suspending Persnicketiness on Sunday: The McRib

By Nicole Zeoli

After non-stop morning radio show banter and endless TV commercials for what felt like months, the build up for the “re-release” of the McDonald's McRib sandwich finally got to me. Bobby heard enough of my “let’s go get a McRib, I really want a McRib, hehe, just kidding", and I was at the point where if I didn’t try one I might regret it the rest of my life. OK, I am being a little dramatic, but I literally had become obsessed with wanting to try this thing.

What really put me over the edge was the “throwdown” that the Z100 morning show had hosted, featuring renowned chef Bobby Flay and his version of a rib sandwich vs. the McDonald's McRib. With the large cast of New York-based DJ’s as the judges, I was sure native New Yorker Bobby Flay would win this, hands (throw) down. But, to my astonishment, just as I was pulling off the exit on I95 for work that morning they announced that the McDonald's McRib had won the throwdown. Blasphemy I tell you! The only thing (Ronald) McDonald's should win over Bobby Flay would be a contest of who’s hair is redder.

My decision had been made, and there would be no more joking about this- I was just going to have to see for myself, what the heck all this hype was. So as Bobby and I (my Bobby, not Mr. Flay of course, although they easily could be mistaken for each other with their red hair and amazing cooking skills) were out running errands last Sunday and the hunger pains ensued we put the little black Jetta that could in route to the closest Mickie D’s we could find.

We could hardly contain ourselves as we pulled up to the drive through menu board (which, of course we didn’t have to reference)- we knew exactly what we were there for… “Welcome to McDonalds” one voice said, “can I interest you in a chocolate triple thick milk shake today?” (Say that five times fast.) Before I could open my mouth Bobby had politely declined, “no thanks,” after which immediately following we heard, “how can I help you today?” in completely different voice than the previous… I guess only certain people are cut out to say, without stumbling, “chocolate triple thick milk shake.”

Although we passed on the shake, we did realize we’d need something to help wash down the McRib we’d just ordered… “and a medium diet Coke.” As we were pulling away after we heard our total, $5.59, I quickly glanced at the menu board, and smack dab front and center there stood a McRib value meal offer, including a medium drink AND fries, for a mere $.20 more than what we were about to pay. But we weren’t there for the award-winning French fries (which I had treated myself to only two weeks prior), we had to get down to business.

As Bobby handed me the bag to open, the smell of sweet and tangy barbecue sauce filled the small cabin of our little Jetter. The excitement was overwhelming, reminiscent of the feeling I used to get as a little kid opening my happy meal box to discover what toy I was getting. I managed to be patient enough to snap a photo quickly, before I took it from the box (that had BBQ sauce all over it and made a mess on my hands) and took the first bite (Bobby was driving and while I was patient, I wasn’t about to wait for him to find a good place to pull over or a stop sign)!

I chewed it well and tried to taste all the flavors it was supposed to have… It was covered in raw onions, and the BBQ sauce seemed to be more of an afterthought (along with the two tiny pickle slices) as it was certainly lacking on the rib patty. I handed the sandwich to Bobby as we pulled up to a stop sign with no other cars in site… He got lucky and snagged one of the pickles with his first bite. However, he too felt the lack of BBQ flavor, and the raw onions just completely overpowered anything else. 


The actual pork patty itself wasn’t as “McDonalds-like” as we expected--it wasn’t fatty or really chewy; it seemed to be a pretty decent texture by fast-food standards. But we still didn’t find the pork flavors we were looking for--I’d compare it to the blandest of a “white-meat” pork chop. Maybe it’s because lately we’ve been really big on slow-cooked pork dishes that involve a vast array of flavors and an extremely tender and “melt in your mouth” texture. But if the pork flavors weren’t there, at least they could have supplemented with some extra BBQ sauce- or even a BBQ sauce that resembled actual sweet and tangy BBQ sauce we’re used to. The one used on the McRib fell extremely short of zest as well, leading us to search and search for any pop of flavor as we chewed and chewed away. RATS!

Though we both were extremely disappointed with the McRib, we proceeded to finish the sandwich, halfsies style, and consumed the 500 calories and 24 grams of fat as planned. All of a sudden, a strangely familiar feeling hit me, and I was once again brought back to my childhood days… And there’s that Happy Meal again… Oh, it’s only a paper doll. (How come Joe always got the cool toy cars?!?!)